The One That Got Away (A Finally Ever After Story) Read online

  He inhaled sharply, as if her words had cut deep, then released his breath with a soft mmmm. “You still smell like sunrise and high tide.”

  “Avocado and almond oil,” she corrected. “I’ve never bought a shampoo that contains either sunrise or high tide.”

  “It’s not your shampoo. It’s you. You smell like—” Kai leaned in, closed his eyes and inhaled appreciatively “—like dawn breaking across the sea. Like the freshness of a wave washing over the beach.” His breath whispered over her cheek, making her shiver.

  Bastard.

  He’d said that on purpose. Taken her straight back to their first night together. The night they’d met. The night they’d spoken until dawn, first here at Grant’s place, in the very room where almost a hundred people now danced the night away, then at a coffee shop and finally at the beach, where they’d sat huddled together for warmth, talking for hours, until the sun rising over the water had taken them both by surprise.

  Stiffening her spine against his proximity, Lily shifted a little to the side, trying to get away from him, which proved to be no easy feat on a rock of limited size. The last thing she wanted was Kai getting up close and personal. If she wasn’t careful, he might just bury his nose in her hair and press his lips to her neck—like he’d done that last eventful night…several times…sending shivers up and down her back.

  She had to change the conversation, focus on something other than the memories. “So, you’re back in Sydney.”

  “I am.”

  “Just visiting?” She kept her tone casual, disinterested.

  “At first.”

  “At first?”

  “My dad’s not well.”

  “I’m sorry to hear that.”

  He sighed. “Me too. Initially when I heard, I came back to spend some time with him, lend a bit of moral support, you know?”

  Lily nodded. Kai had spoken about his father a lot during those three days. The man was Kai’s hero. His role model.

  “But he’s not getting better.” Kai whistled softly, as though he’d inhaled through lips that were twisted in a frown. “In fact, he’s getting worse, fast. Weekends weren’t long enough. I needed to be with him more.”

  Lily couldn’t help but turn to look at Kai. The pain in his voice crept into a part of her heart she’d vowed never to open to him again.

  “So I came back here to live. I arrived on Thursday.”

  Lily struggled to find the right words. She also struggled not to think about the fact that he was living in Sydney again, that they lived in the same city now. “I remember how important he is to you, Kai. I hope he’s okay.”

  “Yeah, thanks. Me too.” His voice was deeper than usual and tinged with sadness. “But he won’t be. It’s one of those things I’ve had to come to terms with.”

  His sadness was tangible. Had Kai been anyone else, Lily would have taken his hand and held it, given him support, lent him her strength. But Kai wasn’t anyone else, and she couldn’t afford to hold his hand, even though it went against every natural instinct. She longed to comfort him. Ah, hell, she longed to touch him.

  Instead, they sat side by side, staring into the night.

  “I left her,” he said suddenly. “Liz. The woman in Melbourne.”

  As if he’d timed his words to fit in with nature, the breeze stopped blowing, leaving them cocooned in a vacuum of silence. Or maybe that was her heart that had ceased beating for a minute, or her body that had been caught by the stillness.

  “That’s a lot for you to deal with in one sitting. Your dad’s illness and breaking up with a girlfriend.”

  “My dad’s cancer I couldn’t control. My relationship I could. So I did. I chose what was best for both of us.”

  Lily’s stomach tightened, like it had been tied in a knot. “Kai, I’m sorry about your father. Really, truly sorry. But…but why are you here? Why are you telling me this stuff?” She didn’t want to hear it. She didn’t want to know anything at all about him or his girlfriend.

  “I’m here because Grant said you’d be at the party tonight.” She sensed him turning to look at her, felt his gaze on her profile as tangibly as if he’d run a finger over her cheek. “And I’m telling you all of this because, my beautiful Lily, you are the reason I left her.”

  Lily’s heart rammed into her ribs. “Y-You’re blaming me for your break-up?” She blinked and faced him, making her expression as stony as she could get it, belying the quivering in her belly and the trembling of her hands. “Way to take responsibility for your own actions, Jettison.”

  “Blaming you?” His laugh was hollow. “Hardly. The choice to leave Liz and Melbourne was all mine. I made it alone, and I take full responsibility for it. My dad’s illness was the boost I needed, but the decision was inevitable. Regardless of his cancer, I would have returned.”

  Lily opened her mouth, but had no idea what to say, so she just shut it again.

  Kai didn’t seem to mind her silence. “Thing is, it’s hard to commit yourself to a woman when you can’t stop thinking of someone else. Hard to make a life for yourself in a new city when the life you want to lead is someplace else.”

  Lily sat speechless. Her heart raced in triple time, making her lightheaded.

  “Liz wasn’t the woman I desired. She wasn’t the one I wanted to kiss or make love to or fall asleep beside. And waking up next to her every morning just reinforced that knowledge. I’d lie in bed, moments before opening my eyes to the daylight, and imagine it was someone else besides me.” He sighed heavily and stared out at the ocean. “It wasn’t fair to her. Or me.”

  Despite herself, Lily couldn’t help but feel empathy for Liz. It must have been pretty horrible for her living with a man who wished he was with someone else. “And it took you how long to realize this?”

  He frowned. “About five minutes. The instant I stepped off the plane, I knew I’d made a mistake. But we had a history. A past. I owed it to both of us to give it a real chance, my best shot.” He shrugged. “I thought time would change me, or change my memories at any rate, but it didn’t. My memories still told me the woman I truly wanted to be with was not the woman I was living with.”

  “The woman you were living with must have been thrilled.” Lily found it interesting that her sympathy lay with the other woman. She couldn’t begin to focus on what Kai’s confession meant to her. She’d spent too long telling herself to forget him, to get over him. She’d trained herself too well. Now her heart would not allow her the luxury of relating his words to herself.

  “She understood. We gave us a try and it didn’t work. There were never any guarantees, just a will to see what would happen.”

  Lily narrowed her eyes. “So what exactly do you hope to accomplish by telling me all of this?”

  A glimmer of a smile, perhaps of hope, touched his face. “Do you really need to ask?”

  “No.” Sarcasm whipped through her before she thought to stop it. “I’m just making conversation to fill the awkward silences.”

  He laughed again, this time with real humor. “This is what I hoped to accomplish. You and me, sitting together and talking, just like we did before.”

  Lily glared at him. “And what, you assumed that once you’d sorted through your feelings for your girlfriend, I’d still be here, hanging out, waiting for you to come back so we could sit together and talk?”

  Oh, Lord, she’d wished and prayed for that, then labeled herself a fool a million times over for her stupidity, naïvety and idealism.

  “I assumed nothing,” Kai said softly. “I only hoped.”

  Chapter Two

  LILY WAS ON HER FEET before she realized she’d moved. “Keep hoping, Kai. You smooth-talked your way into my heart and my life once before, then ripped them both to pieces when you finally found the guts to be honest. Do not think, even for a second, that I might give you a chance to do it again.”

  She turned and walked away with as much dignity as she could muster, taking one cautious step after another,
ensuring she didn’t trip over her own heels. She smoothed her dress down as she walked, aware of its less-than-chaste length. One sharp gust of wind and Kai and everyone else at the party would be treated to a view of her lace underwear.

  Before Lily made it to the door leading back inside, Kai grabbed her hand and tugged it hard enough that Lily stumbled. Kai caught her against him, pulling her close, holding her upright. Without giving her a choice, he took several steps backward, leading them into a darkened spot in the garden. From there Lily could hear the music, but the only part of the house she could see was solid wall.

  His arms wrapped around her, clasping her against his muscled abdomen, trapping her. Her nose was buried in the groove between his shoulder and neck, so when she breathed, his unique, spicy scent inundated her senses.

  Claustrophobia and desire slammed into her in equal measures. A desperate need to escape, to free herself from his steely embrace and breathe fresh air warred with the ache to rub herself against him, press her breasts firmly into the wall of his chest and nip at the salty skin beneath her lips.

  He surrounded her. She could see nothing but his shoulder, smell nothing but his spicy scent, and feel nothing but his strength.

  Awareness didn’t just slither through her veins—it hit her with the force of a hurricane, blowing away her rationality, vanquishing her logic. All she knew was Kai, his aroma, his body, and her devastating need to get closer.

  She struggled against him, using her fists to pound his arms and squirming her hips to break free, but all he did was tighten his hold and pull her nearer.

  “Let me go.” She tried to yell, but her voice came out muffled. “Damn it, Kai, take your hands off me.” He had no right to touch her. No right to trap her like this. He’d had his chance five months ago, and he’d blown it.

  “No. Not yet.”

  Not yet?

  God damn it, how could he sound so calm, so unaffected?

  “Not until you tell me you don’t feel anything. Not until I hear you say that I don’t mean anything to you, that what we shared was a mere drop in the ocean.”

  Lily didn’t have to say a damn thing to him. She owed him nothing—exactly what he’d given her when she’d asked him to leave her flat that last night. She thrashed against him and twisted, first one way then the other, but his arms were bands of steel, and she got precisely nowhere.

  He groaned low in his throat, and when he spoke again his voice was an agonized rasp. “Christ, Lil, even fighting with you turns me on.” One hand clamped on her bottom, holding her hips closer to his, and suddenly Lily understood exactly what he meant.

  She froze. Her struggles may have gotten her nowhere, but they hadn’t left Kai unaffected. His cock pressed against her groin, hard and unyielding.

  “I made a mistake. I chose the wrong the woman. And I’m the fool for that. The loser. I missed you, Lil,” Kai whispered. “So damn much. Every damn day.”

  “Your words are meaningless,” she snapped. “I listened to them once, and it earned me nothing but pain. I won’t listen again.”

  “Forget my words then. Listen to my body. Believe what it’s telling you.” He bent his legs and rocked against her, his hand still clamped to her bottom, his hips gyrating up and down, slowly, seductively.

  How could she not listen? Every nerve ending had stopped to hear what his body had to say.

  Kai dragged the length of his erection over the front of her pussy. And with her wearing little but the flimsy, short dress, every drag reverberated straight over her clit, leaving it swollen and aroused.

  Kai dropped his forehead to hers, and Lily realized she’d stopped fighting him. Hell, she’d even stopped breathing. All she did was stand in his embrace as he seduced her with nothing but his hard penis and gyrating hips.

  “I never smooth-talked my way into your life, Lil. Not once.” He moved his other hand up to her head, thread his fingers through her hair, and tugged lightly so she was forced to meet his gaze. “Whatever I shared with you came from my heart. For the first time, I met a woman who understood me, who listened, who responded, who made me want to tell her everything. I met a woman who fascinated me so much I couldn’t learn enough about her, couldn’t keep my distance from her—no matter how much I knew staying away would be the right thing to do. When I met you, something slipped into place in my heart, like a gear changing.” He breathed slowly, deeply. “That gear’s never slipped back. It’s stayed there, all this time, waiting for my head to realize what my heart knew the second we met.”

  “And what was that?” Lily asked, despite herself. She should be fighting him, she should be struggling for her freedom, but she’d tried that, and all it had gotten her was more caught up in Kai than before. Besides, he hadn’t quit that gentle rocking yet, and it seemed her own traitorous hips had started a rhythm of their own, rocking upward as he rocked down, and down as he rocked up, increasing the friction between them, making her clit hum and buzz and sing with enthusiasm.

  “That you are the only woman for me.”

  And that was all Kai said. Before Lily had a chance to let the meaning of his words settle in, he dipped his head and kissed her.

  Fireworks exploded. Lights burst into color behind her eyelids and frenzied need flooded her system. Kai’s tongue swept seductively into her mouth as his lips molded to hers, creating a hunger that surged to the forefront, seeking, demanding, wanting…more.

  Lily was shocked to find she’d wrapped her arms around his neck. She was even more shocked to find herself standing on tiptoes, desperate to get closer and kiss him harder. His taste filled her mouth, intoxicating her like the red wine she assumed he’d been drinking: full-bodied, bold, rich, and complex.

  No, wait.

  That wasn’t wine she tasted, that was Kai.

  Kai made her skin tingle, her knees wobble, and her lungs seize. Air was no longer important, breathing a mere hindrance. The only necessity was Kai, his mouth, his lips, his tongue, and his exquisite caresses. His hand feathered over her ass and his fingers massaged her scalp. The rhythmic, thrilling tempo of his body moving against hers and the sweet torture of his hard groin against her sensitive clit were all she needed.

  Whatever resistance she’d fostered drained away as she slipped her hand beneath his T-shirt and pressed it against the muscled wall of his chest. Beneath her palm his nipple tightened into a sharp bud, and she scratched her nails gently over it, making Kai groan into her mouth.

  He could have said something then, anything, but he didn’t. He kept his mouth pressed to hers, his lips clinging with a sensuality that melted her bones, and continued his breathtaking caresses.

  His hand slipped beneath the hem of her dress. He skimmed the top of her thigh, found her buttock and trailed his tempestuous fingers over the curve of her ass.

  Insatiable longing engulfed her. She didn’t want those fingers on her ass. She wanted them exploring, seeking, and finding. She wanted them sliding over her pussy, discovering the liquid heat of her passion, and slipping inside her, deep, deep inside. Instinctively she grasped his waist and broadened her stance, allowing those seeking fingers access to her most private of body parts.

  His groan was muffled by their kiss, but his reaction when he dragged his fingers along the crotch of her panties was unmistakable. His cock jerked against her and his shoulders tensed, muscle turning to stone beneath her arm.

  His lips slackened, as though he no longer possessed the energy to kiss her.

  “Fuck, Lily…” His eyes were closed, his face pinched in a pained expression. “Christ, baby, you’re so…wet. So…hot.”

  One finger dipped into her panties, sliding over her moist pussy, sending a cascade of shivers down her spine.

  “I’ve waited so long to touch you again.” His voice was a hoarse whisper. “Dreamed about it.”

  God, she should object. Pull away. Voice her dissatisfaction at the very least. This was Kai—the man who’d shattered her dreams—fingering her. They were at a pa
rty, in a friend’s garden, with hordes of people mere meters away.

  Logic dictated she push his hand aside and show some dignity, some self-respect. But emotion ruled. They were outside, in the dark, hidden from view by bricks and mortar. And this was Kai, the man she’d fallen for in three days and loved for what seemed like an eternity. The one she’d prayed would come back to her. The guy who’d filled her own fantasies with erotic images and tender words.

  “Kai…” His name was both a question and an entreaty. His finger slid over her lips, creating an exhilarating sensation.

  “Yeah, Lil?” He kept his eyes closed. His voice was still a breathless rasp.

  “I hate you.”

  He nodded and plunged his finger inside her, making Lily gasp in pleasure. “I know you do, baby, and I can’t blame you.”

  “You…b-broke my heart.” Her inner muscles tightened instinctively, holding his finger there.

  Kai squeezed his eyes together. “I broke my heart too.” Gently, he withdrew, only to thrust back in at her disgruntled whimper. “Ground it into a million pieces.”

  She rocked her hips, urging him to continue his seduction, to let his finger caress her, make love to her, fuck her.

  “You chose her over me.” His choice had crushed her.

  “I chose her before I ever met you. Thought she might be the one. And then you exploded into my world.” His words placated, his finger delighted and his hips ground into hers.

  His erection felt enormous, thick, long, and hard. The three pronged attack—his hand and his cock and his words—would be her undoing, Lily knew. There was no way she could shield herself from the stimulation of his actions and the mollification of his confessions.

  Pressure and pleasure built within as Kai continued his seduction, the glide of his hand ruthless in its conquest, the grind of his hips as smooth as a dancer’s. Her defenses were falling, failing, her heart beginning to beat again—to the same tempo as Kai’s.

  Release was seconds away, but Lily refused to let go, refused to give in to the temptation that was all Kai. Not while the pain from his departure still echoed through her chest.